A lot of women and young ladies out there, claim to be feminist. While some know the meaning and do things the right way, others don't. So, I will start with a question.
Ques: Who is a feminist?
Ans: A feminist is someone who believes in equal rights for both men and women.
I see a lot of people, especially the men, fighting againt feminism. Why? Why do they fight? I believe they fight, because they feel they will be stripped off their headship in the home, if they allow feminism. Can we blame the men for thinking that way? According to the prison warden in the movie, 'Fighting Temptation,' the answer is a big N and little o = NO. We can't blame them because of the way our women go about it. They abuse and degrade their men, all in the name of being a feminist.
The main aim of feminism is equality, respect and being heard as a woman. We need to be seen as more than sex objects. We need to be seen as intelligent and useful to the society.
Imagine a man sees a woman and all he can think about is sex. He suddenly wants to know how big her boobs are, how large her hips are, what she would be like in bed etc. Please, we are not sex objects. It is so bad that the media has suceeded in making men see us as nothing but sex objects. It is for this reason that some clueless siblings practice incest, pedophiles are on the loose, rapist are out there looking for their next victim. If these men were taught, right from the start, to respect women, these things won't be happening. If they happen at all, at least, it wouldn't be so rampant in our society.
The other day, I was at a shop. I needed to buy some tomatoes for stew. Some men sat at a corner with bottles of drinks on their table. As women, both matured and young, passed, they scrutinized them and discussed amongst themselves which of the women was more beautiful, which of them had bigger hips, bigger boobs , light skin or dark skin and most of all, they discussed about what they felt the women would be like on bed. This is something that happens everywhere in our society. Even the online community is not left out. 95% of men, see us as sex objects, nothing more. When a man starts to nurse the idea of having a woman in bed, sooner or later, he acts on the idea. At the end of the day, she either agree to do it with him or get raped.
Now, aside from seeing us as sex objects, they don't believe that we should be heard. Most men don't like to listen to their women because they don't want to be called sissies by their male counterparts. Fortunately, listening to their women, the constructive and intelligent ones, that is, causes them more good than harm.
I will give an example with a friend, whose husband ran a construction company along side his best friend. This best friend, was also married. They both have wives who are intelligent and smart. However, they are not taken seriously.
Two years past and the construction business blossomed, but, somethings were not right. Seeing a seeming problem ahead, The wives advised their men to not put all d company's money in one bank. They saw that the present bank being used were very careless with the company's account. They gave account statement only once or twice a year, even after the company's accountant demanded for monthly statement of account. However, the men had friends in the bank. These so called friends asked the men to help the bank by not removing their money. They also pleaded that the company uses only their bank. They promised to handle the account better. Since these men trusted those men more than their wives, they left their money with the bank. For the next one year, they made heavy lodgements into the bank account, even though their wives continued to advise them against it. Let me cut the long story short. Sometime the following year, the men went to the bank to withdraw some money, but they were told that their account was empty and that they even owed the bank some money for overdraft taken. They were shocked beyond words. These men never asked for over draft, they were sure they had enough money in the account. But you see, they were not given account statements monthly and so, they did not know when some people, from within the bank, started to withdraw from their account and even went as far as taking an overdraft. As I write this article, the case is in court. However, there is heat in the company. They have to complete some construction jobs that have long been paid for. Unfortunately, they don't have the money to buy the materials, let alone pay labourers to do the job. The company has closed down and those individuals who gave the company some contracts, have also sued them to court.
It's a disaster now for my friend. The problem on ground would have been avoided if those men trusted their wives more than friends.
Now this is not to say you should listen to every gibberish your wife throws at you. You know the woman you married or the one you are currently dating. You know what she is capable of. I'm sure there are so many good advice you can get from her.
Most successful men I have seen, are men who rub minds with their wives. They don't relegate them to the back ground as something irrelevant. This category of men are mostly successful and always happy.
Now, let us look at the aspect of income. A woman works in a company and occupies the same position as the man before her. However, she is paid less because the management feels that a woman shouldn't earn higher than a man. This is wrong. She is exerting the same energy as the man, so therefore, they should be paid equally. Don't you think?
My only unhappiness now, is that women go about demanding their rights in the wrong way. The bible has made it crystal clear that men, will forever be our crown. They will forever be our head and there is nothing anyone can do about it. I don't know about you, but for me, no matter the equality I drive for, when it comes to the issue of 'head of the home,' I don't go there. The head of the home will forever be the man.
So, you want to be heard? you want to be respected? You want to be treated equally? Then start by respecting your man and also give him a listening ear. If he still doesn't listen to you or give you equal judgement, there are harmonious ways to go about it. When you are harmonious, you get a better, sweeter response, even if it takes a long time to come. However, if you fight, quarrel and use your mouth to run him down, all in the name of being a feminist, all I can say is "SORRY" because you would have shot yourself in the foot, at the same time, you will be passing a wrong message to your man. When you do things the wrong way, instead of respecting you, listening to you and giving you equal rights in HELPING him run the home, he will simply kick you out and slam the door to your face.
So I will say to women, "BE A FEMINIST." But, go about it in the right manner.
To the men "BE A FEMINIST." I am sure that if you send your male child to school, you would also send your female child. If you give your son monthly allowances, you would also give your daughter. I believe that both of them would get the same amount because you love them equally. So please, support your wives, daughters and mothers. Give a listening ear to them, even though you don't accept everything they say. Give them their respect and above all, love them.
God bless you all, as you show love and respect for each other.
Till I write again, Cheers!!!